People touch each other, it’s unavoidable, whether they’re of the same sex or not. But when a man does more than touch you without your permission, it can make you uncomfortable, irritated, confused, or even mad.
So, it’s no surprise that you want to know what it means when a guy massages your shoulder. Is he making advances? Does he like you?
There are different reasons why a guy massages your shoulder, and this article will help you figure it out.
In this article, I’ll analyze the possible things it means when a guy massages your shoulder and what you can do about it.
6 Possible Meanings When a Guy Massages Your Shoulder
The relationship you share with a guy and the occasion of the action will determine what it means when a guy massages your shoulder.
If he’s someone you know, he can be comforting you or trying to make you feel better. Also, he may like you and displays his affection by massaging your shoulder. He can also flirt with the action.
Below, I’ll further elaborate on what it means when a guy massages your shoulder
He Likes You
One of the obvious reasons a guy would massage your shoulder is if he likes you. Men find excuses to touch women, especially the women they genuinely like.
So, if a guy is attracted to you, he can touch you, including rubbing your shoulder.
If he’s a colleague, and he rubs your shoulder whenever he passes by your workplace, then it’s likely he’s interested in you.
Perhaps you two are talking and he begins massaging your shoulder, it’s a sign that he likes you and wants to be something more.
If it’s the case that he likes you, then he’ll show other signs, which include:
- Asking you out to dinner and lunch
- Getting you coffee or small gifts
- Remembering small details about you
- Smiling or blushing whenever he sees you
- Staring at you
- Acting shy around you
- Hanging around you
He’s Comforting You
When a guy wants to comfort you, he’s likely to touch you to do so. Touching is an affectionate gesture, and people do it often to show their care.
So, a guy can massage your shoulder to comfort you or reassure you. If you were feeling sad, or you complained to him about something, then he’s massaging your shoulder to make you feel better.
Also, he can massage your shoulder when you feel pain to make you feel better.
He can be your friend, colleague, family, or partner. Massaging your shoulder can help you relax, and his touch can reassure you.
Generally, massage is soothing and helps release tension. So, his action here is to help you relax and feel better.
He Cares Deeply for You
If a guy cares deeply for you, you’ll see it in his actions. When a guy massages your shoulder, one of the things it shows is his deep care for you.
Couples often rub each other’s shoulders when they want to connect deeply. So, if a guy massages your shoulder, he could be trying to get closer to you, and massaging your shoulder is a way to lead you to open up.
Maybe he’s trying to see your mind and know what you’re thinking. Or he’s probably caressing your skin, taking advantage of the silence, so you two can connect.
It’s a great sign that he cares deeply for you. In addition, it’s a great way for couples to unwind and enjoy the moment, without saying a word. Or even while speaking, a shoulder rub will blend in well.
He’s Flirting with You
Another reason why a guy would massage your shoulder is to flirt with you. If a guy is attracted to you, wants to tease you, or get intimate with you, he’s likely to flirt with you to pass the message.
And one of the ways people flirt with each other is to touch them. A massage on the shoulder is a step further. When a guy rubs your shoulder, he’s possibly seducing you.
If it’s the case that he’s flirting, you’ll see other signs which include:
- He continues massaging your shoulder even when you show resistance
- Smiling seductively
- Staring deeply into your eyes while massaging you
- Touching you frequently
He Wants to Get Intimate
If a guy wants to get intimate with you, he may not be vocal about it. Women respond to body language and touch very well, and a guy is aware of that.
So, a guy can begin rubbing your shoulder to let you know of his intentions of sleeping with you.
If it’s the case that he wants to sleep with you, he’s likely to be gentle yet persuasive about it.
These are some of the signs he might show:
- He massages your shoulder with slow gentle strokes
- If you’re in front of a mirror, he’ll hold your gaze in the mirror
- You’ll see the lust in his eyes
- He will move his hands further from your shoulder
- He’ll say things to you while he massages you
He’s Showing Dominance
A guy who feels he’s bigger than the people around him will have a domineering attitude. If a guy wants to be dominant with you, he may rub your shoulder to display that side of him.
He can be a partner, colleague, friend, or family. If it’s the case that he’s dominant, it would be likely he was asking you to do something.
And when you hesitate, he rubs your shoulder to cajole you and to remind you that you’ve to listen.
You may not even need to show hesitance. If he makes a statement, he may rub your shoulder and walk away without giving you room to disagree.
Also, if he’s dominant, his massage will be firmer and uncaring.
What to Do When a Guy Massages Your Shoulder
There are certain things you can do when a guy massages your shoulder. If he’s comforting you, you should relax and acknowledge his care.
Also, if you welcome his advances, you can respond to them also, you can stop him if you’re not okay with it. In addition, you can tell him how you feel about it.
Here are things you can do when a guy massages your shoulder.
Acknowledge His Encouragement and Comfort
If it’s the case that he’s comforting you because you feel bad, then you should acknowledge his care and comfort.
If he’s a friend, partner family, or even a co-worker, then it’s appropriate for you to acknowledge his care. This you can do by allowing him to comfort you, and by appreciating him.
You can show appreciation by saying:
- Thank you dear, you make me feel better
- I love this babe, thank you.
- I appreciate your encouragement
- God bless you, I’ll stop worrying
Relax and Allow Him
Another thing you can do is to relax and allow him to massage you. If it’s the case that he’s helping you with back pain or shoulder pain, then you can relax and allow him.
Whether he’s your partner or not. He can be your colleague or even an acquaintance. If you complain of back or shoulder pain, and he begins massaging you, you can let him.
Also, if you feel sad and he rubs your shoulder to make you feel better, you can relax.
It’s not every time men are making advances by touching you, they sometimes genuinely want to help. So, in this case, he wants to help ease your pain.
However, he may need to ask for permission, but if he’s a friend or close colleague, you can let him have his way. However, it’ll depend on what you think is a boundary.
Stop His Advances
If you’re not okay with the touch, you can stop the advances. If he’s flirting with you and you’re not comfortable with it, you can stop him by shrugging his hands away or telling him to stop.
Doing so persistently will let him know of your displeasure. Also, if he’s only trying to help with pain or trying to make you feel better, and you don’t appreciate it, politely ask him to stop or gently withdraw.
In this way, you will let him know you’re not okay with it without intentionally hurting his feelings.
Respond to His Advances
If you’re okay with his advances, you can let him know by responding positively.
If he’s flirting and you’re okay with it, you can flirt in response by leaning into him, smiling at him, and touching him too.
If he wants to get intimate and you get the message and are okay with it, you can be flirty to show you’re interested.
Tell Him How You Feel About It
You can also sit him down and tell him how you feel about him massaging your shoulder.
If you think he passed his boundaries, you can politely let him know. You don’t need to take offense, especially if you know he’s only caring. But, you can gently let him know you don’t appreciate such a touch.
Summary
When a guy massages your shoulder, he may be trying to ease your pain, make you feel better, or flirt with you.
Also, he may be letting you know that he wants to get intimate with you. In addition, if he wants to show dominance, he can rub your shoulder too.
However, you can either respond positively or stop his advances, depending on what you want.
Also, you should probably allow him to massage your shoulder if he’s comforting you or helping with pain. Don’t forget to thank him afterward.
